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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24721285">The Rain Leaves a Scar</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/108am/pseuds/Tsuki%20no%20Tennyo'>Tsuki no Tennyo (108am)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Codependency, Death, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Torture, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Repressed Memories, Trauma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 01:27:37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,984</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24721285</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/108am/pseuds/Tsuki%20no%20Tennyo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>She was dead, and he hesitated.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Higurashi Kagome/Sesshoumaru</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>33</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Rain Leaves a Scar</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Sending this story out into the universe (read: internet) to see if I can ever regain interest in finishing this wip I’d started like four years ago.</p><p>Title from the eponymous L’Arc~en~Ciel’s song, because I just couldn’t think of anything better.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sesshoumaru stepped out of the bathroom dressed in a sharp gray suit and already smelling the brewed coffee wafting throughout his apartment. In the background, he could hear the news on the TV, though he had turned it on mostly for white noises to fill in the silence of his empty home. He never did find much amusement in human entertainment, but he was tired of the incessant silence that had been following him like a plague for the past centuries.</p><p>As he picked up his briefcase, he turned off the TV, hearing faintly only the last words of the news anchor as he walked away:</p><p>“…the trail to find local missing woman Higurashi Kagome has ended up cold…”</p><p> </p><p>Another day, another charade.</p><p>He couldn’t quite remember when it was that he had first abandoned his demon identity in favor of adopting a human one. He was fairly certain Rin had been gone for at least one hundred years when demons started disappearing one by one, mostly by extermination but also hiding for fear of becoming extinct. He, along with a small group of stronger demons, had chosen to hide in plain sight and learned to live with the humans and adapt to their lifestyles.</p><p>It was because of the primal instinct of survival that had forced many to adopt such disguises. With great reluctance, Sesshoumaru eased into human society, taking on various roles every few decades. He remembered being a rogue samurai, a hired assassin, a wealthy aristocrat, and even a physician at one point in his life. He had adopted so many different names he wondered if there would come a day when he would forget his real one.</p><p> </p><p>“Mr. Kimura, I have arranged your reservation at the mountain inn in Kyoto for your business trip with Ito Group.”</p><p>Sesshoumaru heard his assistant babbled as he stared blankly out of his office window at Tokyo gray skyscape. He wondered faintly what this man’s name was; he was never good at putting in effort learning other people’s names.</p><p>He tapped his pen impatiently on his desk, aware that his assistant was growing nervous the longer Sesshoumaru remained silent. After about two minutes, though, his pen stopped midair as he recalled the man’s name.</p><p>“Inoue,” he started.</p><p>“Yes, sir!”</p><p>“Have you heard from my half-brother?”</p><p>“Um, your brother was meeting with Mr. Akiyama last week.”</p><p><i>The wolf?</i> Sesshoumaru resumed tapping his pen, more as a character tic that he had developed over the years than his earlier reason of impatience. He was so engrossed in his mindless act he nearly missed his assistant’s comment.</p><p>“They left the city quite urgently,” Inoue commented, recalling the last time he had seen the younger of the two brothers, “It seemed like something came up. They—they were both as white as ghosts when they left.”</p><p>“Hm,” Sesshoumaru responded, unfazed by Inoue’s concerns. He dismissed his assistant and returned his attention to the pile of documents he had to read. He held a document in his hand, his thumb was running in circles around it as he stared at the words blankly, too tired to really give it the full attention it should have.</p><p>Not even a minute later, he dropped the papers and turned around to face the window again. He stared at the Tokyo Tower in the distance and wondered when his life had become so mundane and meaningless.</p><p>He was tired of this charade, and perhaps even of his entire existence.</p><p> </p><p>The following day, Sesshoumaru arrived in Kyoto at the inn Inoue had made reservation for him previously. He was immediately escorted to his room and then left to himself as the door slid closed. He opened his baggage, unconcerned by the essentials that lay on top, and immediately reached beneath, feeling the familiar hilt of his sword.</p><p>He carefully pulled Tenseiga out and set it across the bed in his room. Several centuries have passed, and since then Sesshoumaru had never once used the sword for its purpose. Even so, he still carried it with him when he traveled far from home, feeling an unwilling inseparable bond with the sword.</p><p>It was a sword to protect and save, and yet he had no one to do either. Throughout the tumultuous centuries, he had tried and failed many times to discard the sword, always finding it back in his possession one way or another. He suspected the sword and him to remain together for the remaining of his days, though on an instinctive level, he even considered the possibility of it staying with him even well into the afterlife.</p><p>He was the sword’s master, and despite his initial disdain for it, the blade had never once forsaken him when he needed it most. Perhaps because of its unyielding loyalty to him, Sesshoumaru had come to accept their fate and bond together, deeming it to be one of the few precious items to remain in his possession now.</p><p>Leaving the sword on the bed, Sesshoumaru walked over to the window and stared outside at the mountain scenery, seeing thick foliage of trees covering the vast area. He breathed in the fresh, crisp mountain air, feeling more at peace than in the smoggy and overpopulated city.</p><p>He stood there, mediating quietly, letting the tranquil sight eased his mind and body. After about twenty minutes of quiet contemplation, though, he felt his phone vibrating in his pants pocket. He let out an annoyed sighed and reached into his pocket for the device. Taking a quick glance at the screen before answering, he noticed the call was from Inuyasha.</p><p>“What is it?”</p><p>“You’re in Kyoto, right?” Inuyasha asked from the other end, voice sounding strangely urgent to Sesshoumaru. He was half-expecting a brash comment about Sesshoumaru’s dismissive greeting, but whatever was bothering Inuyasha seemed to be a greater concern than Sesshoumaru’s tone.</p><p>“Of course, I am,” he answered, “That meeting with Ito Group is tomorrow morning.”</p><p>“Right, right,” Inuyasha muttered. “Sorry, I’m not going to be able to make it—something came up.”</p><p>“Hm.”</p><p>“Listen, Kouga and I will be gone for a bit. I don’t know how long, but if any of his guys come find you, just tell them we’ve gone oversea or something.”</p><p>“Very well.”</p><p> </p><p>It was early evening when Sesshoumaru left the inn for a walk to clear his mind. It had been so long since he had distanced himself from civilization, he wanted to become immersed back into the land that modern society had yet to touch or stain with their developments.</p><p>He walked down a path, feeling the cool, crisp autumn air tousling his short black hair. He could hear distant bird calls amidst the forest silence, something that was far different from the persistent loud traffic and inane chatters in the bustling city. He was at peace, feeling like he had stepped back in time to his younger years, back when he had taken all of this for granted.</p><p>He breathed in deeply, smelling the clean air, the autumn foliage, the—</p><p>Sesshoumaru paused in his walk, picking up a peculiarly familiar scent, one that he knew he shouldn’t even detect. He recognized this scent from long ago back when he remembered a strange maiden traveling with his half-brother.</p><p>She was a human. She should be dead now and should have been for a very long time, but the odor of death and decay seemed to be freshly mingled with her natural scent.</p><p>How peculiar. He quickened his pace, following after the faint trail.</p><p>He ran through the forest, stopping every once in a while to reaffirm that he was heading in the correct direction. He sniffed the air, smelling the scent of rain approaching. Just as soon as he had detected that new smell, he heard thunder rumbling in the far distance, signaling a storm was coming.</p><p>He couldn’t lose this trail. He leapt high into the trees, moving from branch to branch with agile ease as he searched the forest floor for the origin of his pursuit. His eyes quickly scanned around, smelling the scent was getting stronger.</p><p>Lightning crackled in the sky, and he stopped momentarily, feeling the first raindrop landing on his cheek. He had to move faster.</p><p>He continued his search, growing more and more erratic as he felt more rain coming down. He nearly lost his footing when he caught sight of a clump of hair sticking out of a pile of leaves. He gracefully landed on the ground and approached the pile.</p><p>Kneeling down, Sesshoumaru swept a few leaves aside, freezing when he saw her familiar face buried underneath, pale and bloodied, not like the image he remembered of that feisty priestess that dared to rebel against him.</p><p>He felt her cold cheek, watching as raindrops fell one by one landing on her face before dripping off.</p><p>She was dead, and he hesitated.</p><p><i>Dead, but not yet crossed over to the other realm</i>, he mused silently to himself. He should leave her here. She was nothing.</p><p>As he stood up, he also picked up the scent of semen intermingling with her natural scent and the stench of decay. She had a violent end, sullied and dumped out in the middle of nowhere to be forgotten. It didn’t seem right for her to be here like this. He stared at her for another moment before making his decision.</p><p>He carried her with him back to the inn.</p><p> </p><p>By the time Sesshoumaru returned to the inn, the rain came down hard, obscuring most of his vision for the remaining trip. He leapt to the second floor and carefully opened his room window and snuck in, mindful of the woman in his arms.</p><p>As he stepped in, he sensed Tenseiga pulsating frenetically on the bed, urging him to carry out its deed. He carefully laid Kagome down on his bed and picked up his sword. As he gripped the hilt, feeling the familiar energy resonating through it, he saw minions of the Netherworld approaching her.</p><p>He stared at her lifeless face and then brought his sword down on the creatures.</p><p>He waited, watching as the colors returned to her cheeks and slowly her eyes fluttered opened, coughing violently before she examined her surroundings. She turned her head weakly, staring at him with confused eyes.</p><p>“Who are…” She stopped, eyes landing on the sword he carried.</p><p>
  <i>Tenseiga…?</i>
</p><p>“Sess-Sesshoumaru...?”</p><p>“So it is you,” he murmured, kneeling down to brush her dirty, wet hair aside.</p><p>She stared at him for a few more beats before crying.</p><p> </p><p>He waited as she bathed, thoughts jumbled about what he should do with her now. She had said nothing of how she ended up here in the mountains nearly taken by death if it wasn’t for a twist of fate. He sat on the edge of his bed, his hands fiddling with his phone.</p><p>He wondered now if this was the reason for Inuyasha and Kouga’s strange behavior and abrupt departure. He presumed her disappearance might have made the news and the two demons must have caught wind of it.</p><p>“Sess-Sesshoumaru?”</p><p>He looked up, seeing her stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in a spare dress shirt he had provided her. Her face appeared flushed, and he knew it was not from the hot steams.</p><p>She bit her lower lip, hesitating with her thoughts. She nervously threw her wet hair over one shoulder, the water still clinging to her hair dripped through the white shirt, exposing faintly her skin. She didn’t seem to notice the gesture and he made no comment toward it either.</p><p>“Thank—thank you…for lending me this shirt,” she started and then added frantically, “And for…reviving me.”</p><p>“Hm,” he responded quietly.</p><p>She stood by the bathroom threshold awkwardly, unsure of what to say or do around him. After a few minutes hesitating, she walked over and sat down next to him on the bed.</p><p>He felt the sudden added weight on the bed, watching as she kept a respectable distance between him and her. She was fiddling with the hem of the shirt she was wearing, pulling it down unconsciously to cover her bruised thigh some more.</p><p>They stayed still, unsure of who should be the first to break this stifling silence.</p><p>They heard another crackling in the sky before lightning flashed across, blinding the room for an instant. Kagome flinched.</p><p>“Sorry,” she mumbled, trying to calm her nerves. She ran her fingers through her damped hair, absently detangling it to keep busy. “Your appearance is different.”</p><p>“It has to be so,” he responded curtly. “You humans no longer believe in demons.”</p><p>She laughed nervously. “Of course, of course. Sorry, stupid comment.” She stopped in her inane task with fingers still tangled around her dark locks. “I just never imagined you would blend in with humans.”</p><p>He ignored her thought, choosing to ask his own questions about her instead. “How are you still here?”</p><p>Kagome paused. “Um, I am from here, the modern era that is.”</p><p>“Undoubtedly,” he responded, remembering her green school uniform being a stark contrast to the more humble and modest clothing of the era.</p><p>She sighed again. She knew what he meant, but it didn’t stop her from feeling anymore at a loss for words. She removed her fingers from her hair and turned her attention to the wall opposite of them. “Well, it all started with the Bone Eater’s Well…”</p><p> </p><p>It was nearly midnight and Sesshoumaru sat by the window in his room, watching the full moon lingered in the sky, occasionally hidden by a passing cloud. The storm had subsided only half an hour earlier and in that time, Kagome had fallen asleep in his bed after reciting the history of the well and her time-traveling adventure to him.</p><p>He mulled over the information, feeling no significant change in his perspective of her, but he did pity her for having met a grisly end. He turned his attention over to Kagome, watching the moonlight framed her frail face. She stirred a little in sleep, causing the dark strands of her hair to fall against her cheek. She mumbled and groaned softly, her breathing growing heavier and heavier.</p><p>He tensed up, seeing her become even more agitated.</p><p>“No, no, no, no, <i>no!</i>” She jerked away with sweats dripping down her face.</p><p>Sesshoumaru went to her side, kneeling by the bed to check on her. She didn’t seem to notice him, her hand instantly pulled up the sleeve of her shirt. It was then that he noticed the scars slashed vertically on her arm and what appeared to be rope burns around her wrist. She checked her other arm and it had the same identical wounds.</p><p>She buried her face in her hands, crying softly.</p><p>He tentatively placed a hand on her back, stiffening when she collapsed into his arms and gripped tightly his shirt as she cried and cried.</p><p> </p><p>Faint bird chirpings greeted Sesshoumaru the following morning, though he had been awake all night long. He had lain in bed with Kagome, being unable to detach her from himself after she was shaken away by her nightmare. He watched over her, feeling strangely protective of her, though in their previous encounters long ago, he recalled feeling only indifference in his meetings with her.</p><p>She was like Rin, he had decided after a lengthy reflection, being only the second human he had used Tenseiga on, though he knew she was also not at all like his little ward. Rin had a tragic childhood, but since her revival, he had ensured she knew nothing but peace and happiness in her brief life.</p><p>But this woman, Kagome, he knew nothing of her childhood, though he presumed it must have been at the very least pleasant. That was until whatever led to her untimely and vicious demise. Rin was a child and very resilient. Kagome, on the other hand, was fully grown, already knowledgeable of the world’s indifference and cruelty.</p><p>“Mmm…”</p><p>Sesshoumaru was stirred out of his thoughts when he felt Kagome shifted against him. He looked down at the young woman in his arms yawning quietly before slowing opening her eyes, blinking repeatedly as she tried to adjust to the light in the room. She was a little disoriented, taking a few seconds to stare at him listlessly before she seemed to recall the past night.</p><p>“Uh, oh!” She pulled back from him instantly, face completely red. She bowed her head lowly and apologetically. “I-I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you like that! I—this is not like me, I’m so, <i>so</i> sorry—”</p><p>“It is fine,” he said softly, interrupting her frantic apologies. He slowly stood up, stretching briefly before he took a glance at his watch.</p><p>“D-do you have to be somewhere?” Kagome asked timidly.</p><p>“I have a business meeting in half an hour.”</p><p>“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you from it. Y-you could have just woke me up.” Kagome stared at her hands, still embarrassed by the position she woken up in, but also from inconveniencing him any more than she already did.</p><p>“I was…thinking,” Sesshoumaru said carefully, mind fluttering back to memories of long ago.</p><p>“Th-thinking?”</p><p>“About Rin,” he murmured softly.</p><p>“Rin?”</p><p>Kagome’s blush faded away and she was left with a new sense of curiosity instead. She climbed out of bed, walking over to stand next to him, and also inadvertently causing him to catch sight of the rope burns around her ankles that he didn’t notice the night before.</p><p>He kept quiet about his observation, choosing to clarify his answer instead. “You remind me of her, in a way.”</p><p>“She was a sweet girl,” Kagome recalled. “Did she live a happy life?”</p><p>“Very,” Sesshoumaru murmured. “Until childbirth claimed her.”</p><p>“Uh, oh…” Kagome reached out to touch Sesshoumaru’s arm tentatively, hoping to offer him some solace.</p><p>“It was her third child. The labor was more difficult than the previous ones.”</p><p>Kagome stared at Sesshoumaru, seeing his eyes glazed over remembering a time from so long ago. He didn’t seem to be speaking to her anymore, being lost to the memory he had suppressed for so many centuries.</p><p>“But she was happy the baby was born.”</p><p>Kagome’s heart twisted at his next thought.</p><p>“The baby died two days later after her.”</p><p>She slowly enveloped him in an embrace, though he didn’t seem to notice the consoling gesture.</p><p>“But she was happy…” he murmured to himself, almost like a gentle reminder.</p><p> </p><p>“Isn’t it almost time for your meeting?”</p><p>“I am not going.”</p><p>“What are you talking about?” Kagome stared at him, perplexed by his casual dismissal. He had changed out of his clothing from the day before, but it was more of casual slacks and a shirt instead of what she presumed would be more business-appropriate clothing, like a suit.</p><p>Sesshoumaru was looking at his phone, a sight that Kagome was still trying to get used to among other things about the demon, and he seemed to be ignoring her. He seemed to be sending a text to someone, before he finally placed his phone into his pants pocket.</p><p>“Inuyasha will be here to take you home this evening.”</p><p>“Inu—Inuyasha? He’s still alive?” Kagome couldn’t believe what she was hearing. It had been so long since she thought of the half-demon that was her first love, she couldn’t believe he was still alive and coming to see her again.</p><p>See her. She paused, unconsciously pulling her shirt sleeve down, even though it could not go down any further.</p><p>Sesshoumaru noticed the gesture. “What’s the matter?”</p><p>Kagome looked up, a bit embarrassed, though she knew she had no reason to even feel that way. She turned away, mumbling softly, knowing he would still hear her no matter what. “I don’t want to see him. Not like this.”</p><p>Sesshoumaru stared at the bruises around her legs and remembered the scars around her arms. He could understand where she was coming from. “He and the wolf have been searching for you.”</p><p>Kagome turned to look at Sesshoumaru sharply, a bit surprised by his words. “Inuyasha and Kouga? They have?”</p><p>“How long were you missing?”</p><p>Kagome walked past Sesshoumaru. “I don’t want to talk about it.”</p><p>“You will need to confront your ordeal eventually.”</p><p>“I don’t want to think about it, so could we please just drop it?”</p><p>Sesshoumaru frowned, understanding her reluctance to dwell on the dark subject, but he knew she was also behaving unhealthily by suppressing the events. He had his own opinions on the matter, but he was entirely aware of her disinterest in hearing his thoughts, so he kept silent. Instead, he asked her something entirely different.</p><p>“Where will you go from here?”</p><p>“Huh?” Kagome whirled around to look at Sesshoumaru. He was staring at her, just as impassive as she remembered from so long ago. She fidgeted in her spot, feeling a bit uneased by his intense stare. “What do you mean?”</p><p>“Will you return to your family?”</p><p>Kagome bit her bottom lip. “How long…what’s the date?”</p><p>Sesshoumaru stared at her for a moment before answering, “September 16th.”</p><p>Kagome trembled a little. She sat down on the chair by the window, nearly missing the seat. She gripped the chair arm a bit as she tried to think of her next thought. “I’ve been gone too long. They must think I’m dead by now.”</p><p>“You <i>were</i> dead.”</p><p>“Maybe you should have left me like that then,” Kagome responded, a little too indifferent. She nervously rubbed her left arm, feeling the scabs marring her once smooth skin. “I can’t let them see me like this.”</p><p>“So you would rather them think you were dead?”</p><p>Kagome stared at her hands quietly. Silence filled the room for a moment, with only the sound of the occasional bird cutting through. After a few minutes, though, Kagome spoke up again, seeming to stumble over her thought.</p><p>“There is no…right answer…is there?”</p><p>Sesshoumaru stared at her, unsure of what was going on through her head. He knelt down by her side, but she refused to look at him.</p><p>“I don’t…want to go home,” Kagome whispered quietly.</p><p>Sesshoumaru continued to look at her.</p><p>“I don’t want to see their pity or…I just…I’m still trying to wrap my head around everything, you know?” She felt tears trickling down her cheeks as her mind raced back and forth about the memories, the revival, and everything that awaited her back home. She rubbed at her cheeks furiously. “Great, I’m crying now. I just…I need some time.”</p><p>“Very well,” Sesshoumaru murmured. “Inuyasha will take you—”</p><p>“Does he have to?”</p><p>Sesshoumaru look at her, a bit confused by her interruption. “He knows you are here.”</p><p>Kagome held her breath, thinking. Then, she said quietly, “Alright, just him, though.” She pulled at her sleeves again, and Sesshoumaru said nothing more.</p><p> </p><p>After much persuasion, Kagome managed to convince Sesshoumaru to leave for his meeting, assuring him that he need not be burdened with her any more than he already was. He seemed reluctant at first, but eventually he agreed, leaving to salvage whatever he could of the meeting.</p><p>It was hours ago when he left, but Kagome remained still in his room. She had paced around a bit, taking brief glances at his baggage and belongings nestled against the wall adjacent to the bathroom, but she had remained respectful of his privacy. Kagome did notice, though, that Sesshoumaru had left Tenseiga unceremoniously on the floor next to the bed, and she couldn’t help but picked it up, holding it gently in her hands as she stared at the sword that had granted her life again. She fingered the hilt, marveling its simple beauty in comparison to Tessaiga’s more haggard appearance.</p><p>She felt grateful to the sword—and him.</p><p>Kagome placed it neatly next to the rest of Sesshoumaru’s belongings.</p><p>She paced around the room again, waiting for Inuyasha’s arrival to take her…well, she was a little vaguely unsure what the two half-brothers had resolved to do with her. Quite frankly, she was still a little surprised to learn they had managed to create some sort of mutual brotherly bond and were on fairly pleasant speaking terms.</p><p>She sat on the edge of the bed and stared outside the window, listening to the gentle breeze rustle the bell chimes at the inn and hearing faint idle chatters from the inn patrons in the courtyard. The afternoon sun was slowly descending, painting the sky a soft shade of orange and pink.</p><p>Normally, she would find the sight to be peaceful and beautiful, but in that moment she noticed she felt strangely disconnected with the world, almost like she had left behind a part of herself when she was revived. She wondered what it could be, but she knew she was in no state to head home. She wouldn’t even know how to interact with her family after her ordeal.</p><p>
  <i>Oh, hi, Mama! Sorry I got myself abducted and killed, but I’m all better now because of Inuyasha’s half-brother’s resurrecting sword.</i>
</p><p>She admonished herself for the foolish thought, having played out different scenarios in her head for the past couple of hours, but they had all ended the same with her feeling worse than before. She let out a soft sigh as she crossed her legs uncomfortably, subconsciously aware that she was subduing another memory of her abduction. She felt her stomach twisted as dark images flashed across her mind again. She held her head, breathing heavy, as she tried to push the memories back.</p><p>“No, no, stop laughing, don’t touch me, don’t, don’t, don’tdon’tdon’t—”</p><p>“Kagome?”</p><p>Kagome looked up quickly, feeling dizzy and barely aware of the hot tears streaming down her cheeks. She stared at the dark-haired man at the door in front of Sesshoumaru, and for a moment she was confused until she recognized his voice, feeling a different kind of twinge in her heart.</p><p>“Inu…Inuyasha?”</p><p>She rubbed at her eyes furiously, not noticing the troubled glances Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha exchanged briefly before the younger of the two walked over and sat down next to her. Inuyasha grabbed her wrists and gently pried them away from her face. He brushed the remainder of her tears away with his thumbs before he gave her a weak grin.</p><p>“Hey,” he whispered, “it’s been awhile, huh?”</p><p>She laughed, hoarse and tired and happy.</p><p>Sesshoumaru quietly closed the door, leaving the reunited pair alone.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s been thirteen years and you never came for me once.” Kagome’s voice was a soft whisper, sad and confused, but devoid of any accusation or resentment. She couldn’t look at Inuyasha, afraid she might start crying if she could see his expression, so she stood up from the bed and walked away. She stared at the desk in the room, focusing only on the newspaper Sesshoumaru had left behind there earlier.</p><p>Like her, Inuyasha was also unwilling to meet her eyes. He rubbed the back of his head awkwardly, unsure of where to begin in his explanation. He owed her that much, feeling guilty that he had stolen away a good portion of her fleeting youth.</p><p>He could see her staring at the desk, though he knew her mind was racing with different thoughts. After a few minutes of neither one speaking to one another, Inuyasha sighed, still sounding lost but knowing he couldn’t drag out the silence any longer than he already did.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Kagome,” he started, “I never meant to make you wait for me. I should have met you sooner and…fuck, I’m sorry.”</p><p>Kagome turned around, seeing him still at a loss for words. She smiled weakly trying to reassure him that she was not angry at him, but he wasn’t even looking at her now.</p><p>“It’s alright,” she whispered, continuing more to herself than him, “My friends couldn’t even make their long distance relationship work from different cities. A relationship across over five hundred years is even more unlikely.”</p><p>“Kagome—”</p><p>“I understand,” she interrupted him before he could speak. She walked toward him and then knelt on the floor, arms enveloping around him. “I was just…worried. I was worried something might have happened to you.”</p><p>Inuyasha stiffened a little when she embraced him. He hesitantly returned her hug.</p><p>“I’m just glad you’re alright,” Kagome whispered into his chest.</p><p>“Yeah, I’m glad you’re alright…now, too.”</p><p> </p><p>It was raining again when Kagome returned to Tokyo with Inuyasha after a two-hour train ride, mostly kept in silence because neither person were able to break the ice that had formed since their reunion in Kyoto. Sesshoumaru had said he would return shortly, still having some lingering business to take care of.</p><p>Kagome was surprised when Inuyasha took her to a high-class apartment building in a prestigious district, even more so when he revealed that the large apartment she was staying at was Sesshoumaru’s.</p><p>“Sorry, my place is a bit more cramped,” Inuyasha explained, turning on the lights for her. “I don’t think the bastard would mind if you crash here for the night. If he does, then I’ll handle him.”</p><p>Kagome took a look around, seeing the décor and space being very Sesshoumaru—very organized, pristine, but also very cold and uninviting. The monotony of black and white, with the occasional silver, was evident throughout the apartment, being seen in the furniture and choice of paintings that adorned the walls.</p><p>“Say,” Inuyasha started again, “Kouga and Shippou knows about you…”</p><p>Kagome turned her attention away from an ink wash painting of mountainous landscape she was observing to look at Inuyasha, a bit surprised by his reveal. She bit her lower lip, and then asked quietly, “They have? How are they?”</p><p>“Worried.”</p><p>Kagome was quiet again.</p><p>“They missed you.”</p><p>Kagome smiled weakly, returning her attention to the painting again, though her eyes were a bit unfocused. “I miss them, too.”</p><p>“Sesshoumaru mentioned your reluctance to see people right now—not that I blame you—but maybe you would want to see them?”</p><p>“Funny,” Kagome murmured to herself, “I don’t recall him being this talkative about others.”</p><p>Inuyasha fidgeted a bit. “Well, he’s still an ass, but he’s changed a bit since you’ve last seen him.”</p><p>“Is that so?”</p><p>“Not that I ever know what goes on in that bastard’s head, but he’s mellowed out a bit.” Inuyasha paused for a moment, hesitating again. “So what do you say, you want to see those two guys again?”</p><p>He was looking at her, dark brown, almost desperate, eyes, pleading with her in a way she had never seen them before when they were gold and brilliant, shining with unrelenting determination. Besides the hair length, his appearance really wasn’t that much different from his human form she had seen countless times before during all of those new moons, but it still felt like she was in the presence of a stranger.</p><p>It was him, but not quite. There was something mature about him, something wiser, more tired, and perhaps even yielding. She wondered if he saw any differences in her. She must seem like a stranger to him too, perhaps even more so since it had been over five hundred years since he last saw her.</p><p>“Kagome?”</p><p>She snapped out of her brief daze, seeing Inuyasha was still awaiting her response. She smiled weakly, wondering how different it would be to see everyone else.</p><p>“Alright,” she said, “Sure.”</p><p>“Great!” Inuyasha grinned, pulling out his phone. “I’ll give them a call. We could have dinner here and just talk, you know?”</p><p>Kagome smiled, hoping to hide her nervousness from the half-demon, who had already turned away and was talking to someone on the other end of the phone. She wondered if it would be just as awkward to see the other two demons.</p><p> </p><p>Given the tense atmosphere she had experienced since her revival and subsequent reunion with Inuyasha and to a lesser extent, Sesshoumaru, Kagome wasn’t expecting to be as comfortable as she was with her past friends. It was strange how easily Kagome managed to talk to everyone, almost as if she was a schoolgirl again climbing out of the well and into the past to greet her friends as they carried on in their journey. The only thing she still found a little daunting was just how well blended in with the modern society they all were, with the expected fashion, appropriate hairstyles, and even being up-to-date with technology and the daily lingo of her era.</p><p><i>Our era</i>, she corrected herself, remembering that they had adjusted to each new era as time moved on. Still, she had never imagined Shippou all grown up with earrings and arm cuffs as his choice of fashion. Or Inuyasha with shortened black hair and dressed, more or less, in business-appropriate attire working alongside Sesshoumaru. Even Kouga had traded in the furs for jeans and a plain white t-shirt.</p><p>“Yo, Kagome!” Kouga waved a hand over her face, startling her out of her silent musings.</p><p>She smiled back weakly. “S-sorry. I was just thinking.”</p><p>Kouga gave her a half-exasperated sigh before turning around and shrugging his shoulders. “Pizza’s here. Quit daydreaming or the mongrel and kit will eat them all up.”</p><p>“I take offense to that, Kouga!” Shippou piped up, already stacking three different types of pizza on top of one another before taking a huge bite out of them.</p><p>“Keh, like you’re one to talk,” Inuyasha grumbled, swatting at Kouga’s hand when he attempted to grab the box of sausage pizza in front of the half-demon.</p><p>Kagome stared at the three of them, finding the whole scene to be unreal, and yet the way they were all talking was just like how she remembered. She tried to stifle the giggles bubbling up, but failed when she caught sight of Shippou flicking an olive at Inuyasha’s face. Inuyasha proceeded to grab the fox demon by the collar, and Kagome could no longer contain her laughter.</p><p>The three demons all turned to look at her, puzzled by her sudden laughter. They looked at one another for a moment, confused and hoping someone had an idea of what brought this on, but they were just as equally baffled.</p><p>Shippou spoke up first, trying to wriggle his way out of Inuyasha’s grasp. “Uh, Kagome? What’s so funny?”</p><p>She was still laughing for a few more seconds before she answered while wiping the tears from her eyes. “Sorry, it’s just too funny seeing the three of you eating and fighting over pizza!”</p><p>“Keh, what’s funny about that? The food’s good,” Inuyasha answered gruffly, shoving Shippou back down into his seat. He ignored the younger demon’s glare, only to wince in pain when Kouga pounded him on the head.</p><p>“Idiot!” Kouga turned away, huffing. “She still remembers us from the Feudal Era, so of course she would find this whole thing funny and bizarre.”</p><p>“It’s a tragic day when Kouga starts to make sense,” Shippou said rather sagely, though Kouga caught wind of the sarcasm dripping from his words.</p><p>“Idiots, all of you,” Kouga grumbled, sitting down next to Kagome. He offered her a box of pepperoni pizza. “Hurry up and eat before it gets cold, Kagome.”</p><p>Kagome smiled in gratitude, taking a slice and a napkin on the table. She took a bite, thinking quietly about all of the questions she had for them. She didn’t even know where to begin or even how to bring up the matter in the first place.</p><p>She glanced up at the clock on the living room wall, noting it was almost nine.</p><p>“Say,” Kagome started, interrupting the quiet chatters from the other guys in the room. “Will Sesshoumaru be joining us?”</p><p>“That asshole wouldn’t be caught dead eating something as pedestrian as pizza,” Inuyasha grumbled, helping himself to his fourth slice. He took a giant bite, before answering with a mouthful, “When the bastard even bothers to eat, it’d be some fancy shit like sushi, filet mignon—”</p><p>“Caviar, truffles,” Shippou added, grinning.</p><p>“Foie gras,” Kouga finished with a very atrocious French pronunciation.</p><p>“Besides,” Inuyasha continued with a new mouthful of food, “Why you suddenly interested in that bastard?”</p><p>Kagome blushed faintly, but it escaped everyone’s notice. “No reason. I was just curious.”</p><p>Inuyasha gave her an unconvinced look, causing Kagome to quickly think of a different topic to steer away from her interest in Sesshoumaru’s whereabouts. “Can I ask you guys about everyone else? Like Sango and Miroku?”</p><p>“Oh,” Inuyasha said quietly, dropping his slice back into the pizza box. “Y-yeah, sure. Of course. Well, Miroku and Sango had gotten married a year after you left.”</p><p>“R-really? That’s great!” Kagome felt happy knowing her friends had settled down together. “Did they have children?”</p><p>“Nine,” Shippou snorted.</p><p>“N-nine?” Kagome turned to Inuyasha with wide-eyes for his corroboration, and was met with his immediate, exasperated nod.</p><p>“Would’ve been ten, but the second set of twins was enough to slow even that lech of a monk.”</p><p>Kagome laughed quietly, imagining how chaotic her friends’ lives must have been. She placed her pizza back on the table, looking a little more solemn than earlier. She bit her lower lip, hesitating with her next thought.</p><p>“I…I heard Rin also had children?”</p><p>“Yeah, she and Kohaku had three little ones,” Inuyasha said quietly, grunting softly when he felt Shippou throw a wadded napkin at the back of his head. “Sorry, I meant two. The third baby died…after her.”</p><p>“I—I heard,” Kagome responded quietly. “She and Kohaku had gotten married?”</p><p>“Yeah, after the battle with Naraku, Sesshoumaru had left her in Lady Kaede’s care so she could readjust to living among humans,” Shippou explained. “Kohaku visited the village often to see Sango and her children, but also to see Rin, and well, they just gotten even closer than before.”</p><p>“They’d married when she had turned fifteen, and they had five happy, peaceful years together,” Inuyasha continued.</p><p>Kagome felt her chest tightened at the thought of the two orphaned children she remembered, who had never seemed to be able to escape life’s cruelty. She squeezed her eyes shut, willing her oncoming tears to hold back. She opened her eyes slowly, choosing to focus on her half-eaten slice of pizza to distract herself from the tears threatening to fall.</p><p>“And Kohaku…how was he? What happened to him?”</p><p>Inuyasha sighed. “He…he lost it after she died. He disappeared for days with Kirara, and Miroku and I had to search for him.” Inuyasha paused for a moment, seeming to have some trouble keeping his voice steady. He cleared his throat, and continued, “When we finally found him, he was ready to give up on life, but Miroku forced him to return home, and afterwards, Sango convinced him that he still had the two other children to think of.”</p><p>Inuyasha stopped speaking there, letting a tensed silence filled the room. Kagome felt a nervous twist in her stomach when everyone remained quiet, but she knew she needed to speak up. Hesitantly, she inquired about the young boy’s fate.</p><p>“Wh-what happened then?”</p><p>“He returned to his normal self, or as normal as one can be,” Inuyasha recalled, “He had devoted his life to his children.”</p><p>“But about seven years after Rin’s death, he was killed during what was supposed to be a routine demon extermination,” Shippou added quietly. “He had killed the demon, but its…limb was still alive.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Inuyasha murmured quietly, seeming to have lost his earlier appetite, “went straight through his heart.”</p><p>Kagome felt regretful of asking. She would have wallowed even further in her self-loathing if it wasn’t for the sound of the door unlocking and in stepped Sesshoumaru, a bit confused by the number of people in his home and the strong scent of greasy pizza making its way to his nose.</p><p>Kouga grinned, seemingly forgetting or trying to clear the earlier melancholic atmosphere. “Yo, Sesshoumaru! Want a slice?”</p><p>“No,” Sesshoumaru answered sharply, lips seeming to twitch a bit in annoyance. “Inuyasha, I do not recall allowing these two as guests in my home.”</p><p>“You do realize we can hear you, right?” Shippou asked, clearly offended.</p><p>“Then you should take that as a sign to leave,” Sesshoumaru answered, closing the door and setting his baggage down by the closet.</p><p>“What did I tell you, Kagome?” Inuyasha snorted, “Once a prick, always a prick.”</p><p>She buried her earlier sadness back down. Taking cue of Inuyasha’s jeering, Kagome covered her mouth with her hand, hiding the smile and giggles threatening to rise. She really shouldn’t laugh at someone who had saved her, even if during their previous encounters he had no qualms about killing her. What a peculiar situation she had found herself in now.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Sesshoumaru,” Kagome started, “It’s my fault they are here. We were just doing a bit of reminiscing.”</p><p>Sesshoumaru gave her a pointed look before settling down in his armchair adjacent to her.</p><p>“Very well,” he responded, “You three may stay for a bit more.”</p><p>“Gee, thanks, Lord Sesshoumaru. We lowly demons appreciate your hospitality,” Kouga grunted.</p><p>“Do not test my generosity, wolf,” Sesshoumaru warned, patience already wearing thin by the idiocy he had to endure around these demons.</p><p>Kouga simply shrugged, as Shippou snickered.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t want to find my killer,” Kagome said abruptly, catching the attention of all four demons in the room. She averted all of their gazes, focusing on her restless hands in her lap. She tried to forced one to remain still, but then her other hand started fidgeting. She gave up on trying to calm them.</p><p>“But Kagome!” Shippou stood up yelling and clearly upset by her declaration. “You can’t let that bastard get away with what he did to you!”</p><p>“Quiet, kit,” Kouga immediately growled, shoving Shippou back down into his seat. He ignored the glare he received from the younger demon. “Try thinking before you speak. Put yourself in Kagome’s shoes and imagine what she went through—ugh!”</p><p>He grunted when he felt Inuyasha immediately elbowed him in the rib. He whirled at the half-demon about ready to retaliate. “What the hell was that for, you mangy mongrel?!”</p><p>“Keh,” Inuyasha started, scowling at Kouga with his arms crossed over his chest. “You talk real big like you’re wise and everything, but then you went and made that comment while Kagome is sitting right here.”</p><p>Kouga paused, realizing his error. He flustered. “Well, listen, Kagome. I didn’t mean to upset you—”</p><p>“It’s fine,” she murmured, trying to ignore their comments. She stared at the scars on her arms, and flinched when she briefly thought back to her ordeal. She tried to shake the memory aside and remained neutral. “Just…forget everything.”</p><p>Inuyasha looked at her with sad eyes, feeling helpless for how he could comfort her. “Kagome…”</p><p>“It’s fine,” she asserted. “You don’t have to feel bad for me or anything. I’m alive again. That’s all that matters, right?”</p><p>Inuyasha, Kouga, and Shippou all exchanged uneasy glances, but they quickly turned their attention over to Sesshoumaru when he finally spoke.</p><p>“Enough,” he started, standing up from his place on the couch. “I think it is time to leave her to rest. You three have overstayed your welcome as it is.”</p><p>Shippou started to protest, but one cold glare from Sesshoumaru silenced the youngest demon, who could only sulk in response. Kouga shrugged, clapping Inuyasha on the back. They stood up, stretching a bit.</p><p>“He’s right. Get some rest, Kagome,” Kouga said.</p><p>“We also have some work to attend in the morning anyway,” Inuyasha added as the three left.</p><p> </p><p>Sesshoumaru had tried to give up his bed to Kagome, but she had refused, already feeling embarrassed by how much she had inconvenienced him. She had stated that the living room couch was more than enough for her, so he had left the conversation at that, feeling that her stubbornness would win out no matter how much he insisted.</p><p>It was well past midnight, and in the distance he could hear her soft snores as she slept. He found himself unable to fall asleep, which truth be told, was nothing he would normally be concerned about. He had always rested when he needed, and going for brief periods abstaining from sleep was not something unusual for him.</p><p>He was, however, concerned with the delicate situation he had found himself in, being suddenly in the company of another human, one from his far past who was very familiar with demons no less. He had no idea what to do with her, though she had made it clear that she would not be a burden to him, which in and of itself was not what he was worried about.</p><p><i>She should have stayed dead</i>, he thought, realizing he would be free of this predicament had he not allowed his curiosity to take hold over his sensibility.</p><p>He paused, feeling a faint twinge of remorse when he thought back to so long ago to the little girl that had thawed her way into his heart with her bright smile and unrelenting kindness. If he had never saved her, then he wondered what kind of man he would have been. By that thinking, he wondered what kind of impact this woman would have on him now.</p><p>Sesshoumaru was shaken out of his reflections by the soft sounds of Kagome stirring in the living room. He made out the faint scent of salty tears in the air, and he frowned, realizing she must have had another nightmare. He got out of bed, making his way to the living room to check on her.</p><p>He stood at the end of the dark hallway, seeing her sitting on the sofa with her legs pulled up to her chest and her face buried into her knees. He could hear her muffled sobs as she trembled.</p><p>Without thinking, he walked toward her, sitting down next to the troubled woman.</p><p> </p><p>Kagome looked up when she felt the added weight on the sofa, surprised to see Sesshoumaru next to her. He had a peculiar look on his face, which she couldn’t decipher whether it was good or bad. She rubbed at her tearstained face furiously, sniffing quietly.</p><p>“Sorry,” she mumbled, “did I wake you?”</p><p>He shook his head.</p><p>She waited for him to say something, but seconds ticked by without any sign of him getting ready to speak. Kagome swallowed weakly.</p><p>“Um, sorry,” she repeated again, unsure of what to say. “I…I’ll be out of your hair in the morning.”</p><p>“What will you do?”</p><p>She paused, not expecting his question at all. Kagome slowly relaxed her legs, feeling her feet touched the hardwood floor. She tried to think of a response, but nothing came to mind.</p><p>“I should probably return home…that is, if I even still have a home…” Kagome stared at her hands. Her eyes widened briefly when her latter thought led to another. “Crap, and my job...and…my life is all fucked up now, isn’t it?”</p><p>Sesshoumaru seemed unsure whether she was seeking a response, but Kagome continued anyway.</p><p>“I know you think I should return home and yeah, that makes sense, but I…I don’t want all of that attention right now. I mean that’s a horrible thing to say, but I just—I just—”</p><p>“Then stay,” he said.</p><p>Kagome looked at him, eyes wide, uncertain if she had heard him correctly.</p><p>“Wh-what?”</p><p>“Stay,” he repeated. “Until you recover. Until you feel ready.”</p><p>Kagome blushed, feeling embarrassed by the offer. “You don’t have to feel like you’re responsible for me or anything. I’m a grown woman, I can figure things out—”</p><p>“I am offering you this of my own free will, Kagome. Stay if you need to.”</p><p>Kagome looked at him, hesitating, but then slowly she breathed in before whispering softly, “Okay.”</p>
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